In 1994, at 28 years old, I became the youngest high school assistant principal in South Carolina, serving at the state’s third-largest high school. Life was a whirlwind. I was married, raising a two-year-old, managing a full social and church life, and working toward my Ph.D., which meant commuting an hour and a half to and from campus weekly after working all day.. The pace was relentless, and exhaustion was a constant companion.

As part of a graduate class in personnel at the University of South Carolina, we were required to attend a conference for personnel administrators in Greenville. I was diligent. I attended every session, took detailed notes, and absorbed as much as possible. At the end of the first day, a reception was scheduled. It was a typical part of conference culture, but it felt like an optional social gathering filled with small talk and drinks. I was exhausted. Instead of attending, I ordered room service and enjoyed the rare quiet of my hotel room. It was a moment of rest that young mothers rarely get.

The next morning, I felt refreshed and ready to learn. As I made my way to the conference rooms, I ran into my professor. We had always shared a good rapport, and I considered her a mentor and even a friend. That morning, however, she did not look pleased.

She pulled me aside and told me, quite bluntly, that I had missed the most important part of the conference: networking. She explained that the education community in South Carolina is like a small town, where relationships are everything. By skipping the reception, I missed a critical opportunity to make connections that could support my career for years.

She did not ask why I had chosen not to attend. She did not know I was tired to the bone or that I simply needed space. Her words stung. I wanted to defend myself. I wanted to explain that I had not been out partying or avoiding responsibility. I had just needed rest. But the reason did not matter. What mattered was the lesson she was trying to teach me.

None of us likes being called out, and I am no exception. But the truth of what she said stayed with me. It reminded me of a quote I once attributed to Maya Angelou. However, I later learned it came from Maimonides, a medieval rabbi and philosopher: “Accept the truth from whoever utters it.” No matter the source, the truth is still the truth.

Thirty years later, I fully understand the value of that lesson. The power of networking has shaped my career. Relationships have introduced me to mentors, opened new opportunities, and helped me step into roles I never imagined. Today, I make it a priority to help others do the same.

Networking is not just about professional advancement. The right connections allow us to do the good work that needs to be done. They help us build authentic partnerships, solve problems, and move ideas forward meaningfully.

We often talk about networking, but what does it look like in practice? Here are a few ways I have seen it come to life.

What Networking Looks Like in Action

In-Person Networking

  • Attending Events: Conferences and professional gatherings are great places to introduce yourself, share ideas, and build relationships.
  • Casual Conversations: Sometimes, the most valuable connections begin with a spontaneous conversation in an elevator, at a coffee shop, or during a break.
  • Following Up: After meeting someone, a short message or email can help sustain the relationship.

Online Networking

  • Engaging on LinkedIn: Sharing posts, commenting, and connecting with others in your field keeps you visible and connected.
  • Joining Online Groups: Participate in forums, professional Facebook groups, or Slack communities related to your interests and expertise.
  • Cold Outreach: Reach out to someone whose work you admire. A thoughtful, personalized message can go a long way.

Giving and Receiving Support

  • Offering Value First: Share job leads, introduce colleagues, or provide helpful resources without expecting something in return.
  • Asking for Advice: Reach out with genuine questions and a willingness to listen.
  • Collaborating: Work with others on projects, share ideas, and build something together.

Workplace Networking

  • Cross-Department Relationships: Connect with colleagues outside of your immediate team to broaden your perspective.
  • Participating in Socials: Attend work events, happy hours, or team lunches to build rapport in informal settings.
  • Seeking Mentorship: Reach out to those whose leadership you admire and ask to learn from their experience.

Networking Through Volunteering and Hobbies

  • Joining Professional and Community Organizations: Engage with groups that align with your values and interests.
  • Connecting Through Shared Interests: Whether it is a book club, sports league, or service group, relationships built through common interests can lead to professional growth.

The key to all of this is authenticity. Networking should not be transactional. It should be rooted in real relationships, mutual respect, and a shared commitment to growth.

That missed reception in Greenville became one of the most important lessons of my early career. Networking is not just a social activity. It is a professional responsibility and a powerful tool for impact.

And for that lesson, I am forever grateful.